Archive for November 1st, 2004

Morrissey Haikus

Probably the only person who will enjoy todays entry is me. Maybe Amirah too, but I don’t think she reads this. I have been listening to Suedehead today and feel compelled to review each song in haiku form.
The Moz
Ok, i get it
You’re sorry. Hey, what IS a
Suedehead anyway?

I don’t know any
one named Sunny but if I
did I’d miss them too.

I picture this song
as the soundrack to old men
in bareknuckle fights.

The sun will come out…
as soon as someone puts their
arms around the Moz.

A lovely duet.
I wonder if Moz knows her
name is not Siousxan.

Everyday is Like Sunday
I feel like I’m on
an English beach with a bad
rep for tourism.

That’s Entertainment
Can’t decide which I
like – this version or the Jam’s
original cut.

Hold on to Your Friends
This song uninten-
tionally reminds me of
high school. That’s too bad.

My Love Life
Saddest sentiment
ever! You love another,
but please love me too.

Interesting Drug

I love this song. Can
you blame us Can you blame us?
Plus, Kirsty MacColl.

Our Frank

My boss’ name is
Frank. But Frank like Francis, not
frank like “I’m real blunt”

Picadilly Palare
It is harder to
translate this song than it is
A Clockwork Orange.

Ouija Board, Ouija Board
When you spell out your
name – S-T-E-V-E-N
well, I love that part.

You’re The One For Me Fatty
Finally, a song
for those of us with a lil’
junk in the old trunk.

We Hate it When Our Friends Become Successful
Me too! Now all he
needs to write is a song that’s
about schadenfreude.

The Last of The Famous International Playboys
The way he sings “I’m

not naturally evil” makes
me think that he is.

Pregnant For The Last Time
A rockabilly
song that makes me crave pickles
with peanut butter.

November Spawned a Monster

Quintissential Moz
wherein I don’t get the lyr-
ics but love the song.

The More You Ignore Me, The Closer I Get
Calling my number
and following me around?
Not cool pal. Not cool.