Fudging the Whale

Over at Chez My House we are fans of Ace of Cakes on the Food Network. We don’t record it or even know when it airs normally, because it’s just always on. Everyone on the show always seems to have been visited by the weed fairy, which makes their cake-making endeavors funny and also very soothing at the same time. Despite deadlines and collapsing layers of ganache and sponge, everyone seems high, which is only way the construction of a yak made out of fondant would make sense anyway.

TV-Watching Companion and I spent a lot of time in front of the tube over our holiday break (we both had about 2 weeks off, it was insane and I’ve developed a taste for early retirement as a result). We had been recording but not watching Whale Wars on Animal Planet because it looked awesome, so we finally decided to do something about it. Whale Wars is like a much higher-stakes Ace of Cakes  in that everyone seems a little high, but also, they are risking their lives to do kind of dangerous things like jump from one moving boat to another to spread a message of non-violent, eco-protest-y whale-saving, and they have no clue what they’re doing.

The captain of the ship on Whale Wars is generally an a-hole who is willing to put other people’s lives on the line and not have a problem with that, but everyone on the ship drank the whale oil and is like “Captain says breach, I say how high!” The group of whale-lovers spend their days trying to obstruct Japanese whalers by using really irritating methods – throwing stink bombs aboard their ships, tangling lines in their propellers, the aforementioned jumping aboard the Japanese ship to create an international hostage crisis (even though the whale-lovers willingly jumped aboard another ship, they claimed to be held hostage? Explain that pot-scented logic to me, please). I’m all for saving the whales, but after three episodes I started rooting for the Japanese. The series seems like it would be better suited to perhaps a two-hour special and not a 7-episode series. They should really have followed the model of Miss America: Countdown to the Crown which is three short episodes culminating in the actual Miss America pageant. Not that I watched. The only pageantry I indulge in involves education in the Iraq. Such as.

Avoid Whale Wars and watch an Ace of Cakes marathon while eating a Fudgie the Whale cake instead. And enjoy this joke I just made up.

Q. What does a whale on a diet eat?

A. Baleen Cuisine.

You’re welcome.

    • Glennis
    • January 14th, 2009

    hahahaha! you rule!

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